Job Listing Fraud?

I've noticed an interesting trend develop from companies who are in the catbird's seat for hiring the "perfect fit." This trend is to use faux open requisitions in an effort to collect resumes for potential future expansion. This staffing strategy makes sense given the 11% + recorded unemployment rate in the Bay Area. Obviously the HR teams receive a large volume of resumes and are under no obligation to respond to any submission or actually hire anyone for the supposed job. To use a sales term, I'd call this process "seeding" for future growth. As the economy expands, these companies will have a stable of talent to choose from. However, this process could have unintended consequences by creating a talent pool that may no longer be active when the job is actually open. Additionally, from the job hunter's point of view, this tactic could be called job listing fraud.

An unemployed colleague of mine provided a solid data point to support this point of view. A recently "uncloaked" (Star Trek fans?) stealth start up had posted several job requisitions including one for legal council. My colleague applied for the legal position and later learned from an internal that there was no intention of filling the position. "Why did you post the job then?" she asked. "Well, we wanted to collect resumes in case we need more legal support if certain deals materialize in the next six months."

This strategy on the surface makes sense. However, the unintended consequence could be a collection of outdated resume submissions. Candidates may have found a job, altered their list of target companies to work for or have adjusted their career focus. The HR team will be tasked to go through this stable of resumes and weed out these submissions through follow up emails and phone calls...which is a time consuming process. I think the more efficient process would be to post a job requisition only when the hire is really needed. The resumes submitted will be the most current and relevant work force.

The job hunter may view the faux job listing strategy as a form of fraud. Job seekers will feel taken advantage of after investing the time and energy to apply for a position and to do the necessary LinkeIn networking...to only learn the job was not "real." The opportunity costs are real as job applicants may have missed the window to apply for another job posting with real opportunity. Remember, in this environment those who apply the quickest and can garner an internal referral will increase their chances of being seriously considered.

The lesson learned from a job hunter's perspective is to verify the status of the requisition and then make the decision on how to prioritize. Verifying status may be tricky, but this is where the network comes in. If you don't have a contact, an alternative is to send a brief enquiry email response to the job posting. I've found that when asked, HR representatives have responded quickly to verify a job posting. However, be careful with this process. If the position is a great fit, it may be worth a cover letter and resume submission as quickly as possible to maximize opportunity for a response.

The lesson for hiring companies, I believe, is to be more transparent in their hiring processes so potential candidates can apply with eyes wide open. An HR solution is to create an "active jobs" section and a "future hiring needs" section on the "Jobs" page. This designation enables potential candidates to make a decision to actively apply or to seed for future opportunities...following the same strategy of the hiring company.

Keep the marketing skills current

This past Sunday Business section of the San Jose Mercury News had two great write ups by Patrick May that offered great advice and comparisons and contrasts of the current down turn to the far less in scope dot-com bust. Both articles struck a cord with me because I am a veteran of the dot-com bust and I'm now working my way through the current economic and industry shift...and will survive yet again. I encourage all who are denizens of this crazy valley to click the links and read Patrick's prose. Nice work.

I was struck by the "advice" offered by Martin Hendess in the "Tips/Advice from layoff veterans" article:

"Martin Hendess, 39: "I'm personally at a bit of a disadvantage because I have a broader marketing background, yet companies today are looking for very specific skills. And if you don't have 10 out of the 10 items on their checklist, they can easily move on to the next candidate because there's such a huge pool."

As a fellow marketing professional, I echo this perspective and would like to add a few possible solutions. Like Martin, I have a general marketing background that was sought after during the early days of the Internet revolution. My MBA concentration was in Marketing Management to boot. There has been a strong shift in desirability for marketing professionals to be more specialized and almost more tactical in skills. However, I think there is still demand for professionals who have the depth and experience to understand marketing at the strategic level and have a point of view for how these new specialized skills support a marketing strategy. What the market is telling us generalist is to become familiar with and learn the new technologies and processes to interact with consumers...which is becoming more 1:1.

The best education on these new marketing tools comes from reading the latest marketing blogs, talking to those in the field and actually jumping in to do it. Remember, these specialized skills were not main stream 5+ years ago and the text books being used in MBA elective courses are now out of date. Independent real time learning is the key.

Learn the new marketing skills and find a project to apply and perfect the knowledge. I am applying my acquired knowledge of building customer communities and how to harness the power of blogging to help a friend build a consumer facing business. Developing a plan and learning by trial and error has taught me a great deal about marketing to the social web.

The big win after this exercise is that I can add this skill set to my resume and will have tangible results to demonstrate effectiveness. I can not only bring social media marketing skills to the party, but can also provide a perspective on how these new skills fit within the larger plan...a perspective gained only through 12 + years of marketing experience.

You can receive messages back from the resume black hole!!

Events of this past week have proven two of my key learnings for conducting an effective job search; one, the importance of creating a list of target companies to work for to help narrow a search and two, submitting a resume even if a job is not the 100% right fit or not posted at all.

Last month I submitted a resume for a junior position at a company that just recently launched a smart phone designed to compete with the RIM Blackberry and the Apple iPhone. I received the automated "thanks for applying" email, but had not received any further communication from the resume black hole....until last Friday.

I had just got back from my 9:00am Friday morning run when my iPhone rang. The voice at the other end was the VP of Marketing for this re-energized smart phone company that, rightfully so, has sweaty palms. The VP had received my resume from HR who had filed it away for future use. Interesting...these online submission portal black holes have another side to them! The marketing team is in need of someone to lead their relationship marketing strategy and implementation and the VP found my experience very relevant. Cool.

This morning I met with the VP amongst all the media buzz of the new device. The conversation was very rich and a lot of fun. "What would you do to help us build relationships with our customers" type questions flowed. Fun. "It's all about engaging and winning the gadget enthusiasts...who, if they love it, will effectively sell the product for the company...and will engage others in the conversation. "

So where did this all net out? I'm not really sure. The job req has been approved, but no job description has been created. My meeting was more of a "meet and greet...and let hear how you think" session...or said another way, "a VP level initial screening." Hopefully I'm on the VP's short list of potential candidates when the interview process officially begins.

My biggest concern is will I need to publicly denounce my iPhone should I become employed by this private equity funded company who is looking to reclaim it's place in the hand held space? But...I love my iPhone.

Employers be ware: the perils of hiring a free workforce

The affect of the current economic downturn is far greater on the Bay Area job market than the downturn of the "dot.com bust" era in the early 2000s. Living through the downturn of the "bust," I can remember being fairly optimistic that a job would pop up and I did some consultant work to make ends meet and to give my idle brain something to chew on. However, based on this news story on these Job Nob gatherings/happy hours, it seems high tech employees are now willing to "consult" for free in hopes of securing a full time job when funding comes around. Yikes...



I remember consulting at Excite.com in 1996 as a way to get my foot in the door...which lead to me eventually landing a full time job. Now it seems the new trend is to no longer consult, but to intern. Hmmm...if people with 10+ years experience are taking the internship type jobs...where does that leave our college interns? Now of course a 10+ years of experience intern will do the job of a well experienced professional, but this trend is adding a skills hierarchy to a now free talent pool.

I see this trend creating a precarious path for struggling, funded and established companies. Yes, the job market is extremely tight now and is so tight that a willingness for skilled professionals to work for free is now a competitive advantage. From a worker's perspective, it sure beats watching Regis and Kelly in the morning and shopping at "Social Safeway" in the Marina looking for the value card specials on a Monday afternoon.

When the economy changes, however, worker's desire will quickly disappear as they seek revenue generating opportunities to pay the bills. Companies who get funding or have a growth in revenue will hire the knowledge base away from the other less funded organizations. Maybe this is a competitive strategy to learn what the under-paid competition is doing?

Companies who are hiring a "free" workforce really need to think through this process carefully. This trend may seem great now...but remember, you get what you pay for. An uncompensated worker is patient for only so long and money talks...especially in the Bay Area. When the free employee leaves, he/she takes a knowledge base to the next job...and knowledge is a competitive advantage. Executive staff may consider re-balancing strategic initiatives and work flows to match current bandwidth...and consider building the team when revenue's grow like most companies do in a soft market.

As for the idle worker...well that's a tough one. I've been using my time to build my marketing "tool kit" to become a stronger marketer and leader. I've been reading books and visiting AMA type blogs. When my butt gets soar from sitting too long and I've listened to all my iTunes music, I've been going for some great runs on the Los Gatos trail in the afternoon. Cool.

Comments welcome.

Apply for the job even if it's not posted

I have heard from several career search resources to create a target list of companies that I'd "dream" of working for. After I created my list, I clicked on the "Jobs" link of each company's website...to unfortunately not find any marketing positions posted.

I am fortunate to know a few people at one of my "target" companies. I took the initiative and sent a cover letter and resume to touch base with my friends, inform them of what type of position I'm looking for...and to "fish" if my contacts may know of positions that are not posted or may become available soon.

Bingo...this strategy paid off.

My contact was quick to respond with a note informing me of a marketing position that is an internal posting and has not been made public. He advised me to quickly submit my resume to the hiring manager with a cover letter referencing my internal contact. This worked like a charm...within a few days I got a call from the HR team asking for my availability to come in for interviews.

The big lesson here is to understand that companies are always looking for good people. Take that chance and submit the resume and cover letter to the dream companies for one never knows what may be in the works behind the "vail" of the job boards.

Do your homework

This past weekend I was preparing for a job interview at a photo sharing, publishing and storage e-commerce company. I am excited about this opportunity for I've been a user for a few years now and understand the business and products. Deepening my knowledge, I spent time online searching for the latest news,financial reports and blog chatter about the service. I did this to not only deepen my knowledge, but to help develop and refine my thinking for strategic insights and business development recommendations to share during the interview. Given the competitive job market, it's more important than ever to bring to an interview thoughts on what can be done to build a business as opposed to just having deep knowledge of the present business. This may seem like a "well, duh" insight, but according to comments made in the "Where the Jobs Are: Special Report" on CNBC, this may not be a focus for many interview candidates.
So how does one do this? Do your homework! Get to know the industry the company plays in and most importantly, understand the forward looking trends. I ran several Google searches on industry related topics (opposed to company)such as "digital photgraphy," "photo printing" and "self publishing" to gain insights on where the industry is heading on a macro level. I also read through a few tech and photo blogs to understand the latest industry and consumer thinking about the industry and the company. Lastly, I took note of how I use the product, how I take pictures and share, what devices I use to take pictures with. There is no better way to gain insight than to USE THE PRODUCT.

Note that this process will take time. Don't start the night before the interview...an interview is like a mid-term and final exam, but the grade has a financial impact on you. Once you've digested the data, the trends, etc. brainstorm with your friends, spouses, significant others, etc. I found conversations with others about the product insightful. For example, I learned that many of us share the same frustration that there is no easy way to bulk upload and share all the pictures on our Smart Phones. I also learned that many people are using their Smart Phones to take pictures...and find themselves using their digital cameras less. I took these insights, gathered data on Google and formulated a recommendation to share during my interview. Cool.

I learned that I am one of 3 other candidates for this position. I know I've done my part in positioning myself as a valuable player for this organization. Now it's up to the company to decide who is the best "fit" for the job. That is completely out of my hands.

Turn off the pessimistic news...it's not that bad out there!

A week or so ago CNBC aired a special report called "Where the Jobs Are: Special Report" hosted by Erin Burnett and Carl Quintanilla. I was unable to watch the program, but was able to find the content online. I think the site is worth a review...and we all may want to find future airings and get it on the TiVo. I will focus my next several blogs on offering my point of view on this content from the perspective of a e-commerce/Internet marketing in the Silicon Valley.

I understand the fear of being unemployed that grips people. Not being employed and having an income is scary, but I think the pessimism within the market and country is exacerbating the problem. The CNBC report mentions that nearly half of all Americans FEAR of becoming unemployed and 90% say now is a BAD TIME to find a quality job. This language may reflect the sentiments of Americans...but is the fear warranted or does it inhibit us from finding the solution?

The unemployment rate in some states is hovering around 10%...but that means 90% of the people are employed. If I remember my econ policy class correctly, the unemployment rate during the Depression was roughly 25%....and capacity set idle for several years. Unfortunately too many politicians are saying "the worst economic environment since the Depression." These repeated statements reinforce the fear. Based on these data points, it sounds like we are NO WHERE NEAR that state of the economy during the Depression.

Now I am an optimist and see the glass half full. Since I've started my job search in early February I have found opportunities to explore. I've spoken to recruiters who have all said "there are jobs out there...just be patient." I've had phone screens, interviews...and have been doing A LOT of networking. But the opportunities are out there. All of us on the hunt must leverage our networks, apply new tools available like Jobaphiles or TwitterJobSearch and continue to do our home work for where opportunities may exist. Unlike the Valley in the mid 1990s where the jobs found us, we now must find the jobs.

I suggest that we all turn off the news for a while and get busy searching.

This too shall pass.

Stay positive and on routine

This morning I was following up with several friends and contacts who I reached out to late last week. My goal of these follow-ups is to keep top-of-mind of friends as if to say "hey, I'm here...don't forget about me." The goal is NEVER to be a pest, but to simply keep oneself visible as employed contacts deal with their hectic days and always growing email in-boxes.

One of my emails this morning was to a friend who works at a potential employer that has a great CRM opportunity. My contact knows the internal recruiter for this job...so it's important to stay visible and connected. The follow up email did it's trick and I confirmed that my resume is now in front of the right people. Thanks!

However, out of this correspondence came another job search "nugget" of advice. My friend has always had a great sense of balance and presence both physically and mentally. It's relaxing just be be around him. In his response back to me he closed his email with a piece of wisdom spiritual masters typically provide during daily contemplative prayer.

"Stay positive and on routine."

Being laid off displaces all of us from the basic daily routine of working....getting up in the morning, working out, going into work, driving home, having dinner and spending time with the family...and the cycle starts again the next day. I thinking maintaining the same routine reduces the shock of being laid off and enables stronger focus on the goal of finding the right next job. It also helps keep a positive outlook when the "we found another more qualified candidate" emails and phone calls come in.

Great advice.

School is never out

I just had morning coffee with the VP of the last group I worked in before leaving eBay. As a marketing professional myself, I greatly appreciate this VP's mentoring and marketing insights for he lead organizations at Proctor and Gamble, Taco Bell and eBay. He knows his stuff and is a Marketer's marketer.

We spent the first 10 minutes updating each other on our personal lives and then we got down to "business." I provided my standard 2 minute "elevator" pitch that begins with "when I made the decision to leave eBay" and ends with "and then the revenue dried up and now I'm on the hunt." I also brought optimism to the conversation by sharing that I had interviews at PlayPhone, Shutterfly and Chegg. Vice Presidents are sharing a different elevator pitch.

"I think the days of having a big budget, a staff and a corner office are gone," he began. "Any company that has a budget...is holding it tight. I think more companies are looking are marketing on more of a project basis...they want to accomplish a finite task...and then move on. There simply is not enough company revenue out there to do BIG stuff."

I took a sip of my cooling latte.

"I'm starting my own consulting company...which is strange for me. I want to provide a service that helps a company evaluate their products, or evaluate their current marketing tactics...to then develope a plan to lead and execute for them. So I'm pulling together a lot of the programs and thinking that we did at eBay and providing that bundle as a service. Having to pound the pavement for new business is tough."

The next several minutes were spent talking about the realization that in downtimes marketing teams need to really demonstrate their value...and adapt to the changing environment. We also discussed the fact that school is never out for a marketer...or for any business professional for that matter. The strategies and tactics marketers applied 5 years ago are very different than those of today. The social web, for example, has brough the concept of "direct marketing" or "1:1 marketing" to an entirely different level where brands talk to and interact with consumers directly.

"Always keep up on what's going on in the marketing world...understand the new ways to approach marketing...have a point of view...and be able to articulate what to do with it," he added.

"Yes, I agree," I replied. "But I really think that it's those of us with deeper experience who know how to integrate the new thinking (tactic) into the overall marketing strategy so that it's effective. The more experienced marketer continues to add a lot of value provided we keep current."

I hope I'm right...or experienced marketers like the VP and I will be out of a job!

The lesson learned this morning is to always keep refining and building the "tool box" for whatever profession you are in. These new tools will help all of us adjust to any industry changes that ARE happening now.

Well, I'm off to half.com to buy the latest marketing books to learn about the latest trends. I think my first stop will be "Marketing to the Social Web," by Larry Webber.

Know what you are looking for

This past Tuesday afternoon I checked in with the VP, Rob, of the group I used to work in at eBay Motors. Over my tenure at eBay I have developed a great relationship with Rob who always has a steady hand and mind to guide a business or colleague through a challenging time period.

"Be sure to know what you are looking for before you begin your search. Don't just apply for jobs to get a string of interviews," be began. "You will waste your time. By the time you interview, they will be selling YOU on the opportunity as well...and you will lose perspective if this is a job you REALLY need to grow. Take some down time and think through what you want to do next...and what factors are most important to evaluate a position against."

Hmmm....what are the most important factors? Well...decent money is important!! He he. Factors may include: industry, size of company, money, scope of position, career path growth, title,geographic location.

"Whatever your criteria," he continued "be sure to rank them and give yourself a time period to find a position. If at the end of the time period there is nothing doin'...then re-scope. Let's say industry is really important to you...but if over 6 months there is no job, maybe reconsider that #1 factor."

Given the economic times I think it's important to jump on an opportunity that has cash in the bank and is in a "growing" (at least not declining) industry. These two attributes will enable me weather the storm for a few years. A third attribute is growth opportunity to expand my marketing and leadership abilities within the organization. The money...well there are salary ranges that I'm well aware of...but to what end of the spectrum is negotiable looking at base, bonus, stock (yeah right) etc. I do have a magic number though...don't we all?

Over the next three months my job search criteria will be...

1. Well funded organization (most likely a brand name)
2. Company is "growing" (or at least not expecting to downsize in the next six months)
3. Opportunity to grow in my role
4. Compensation (within ranges)
5. Title
6. Geographic location

Five years ago my list would have been different...many companies were well funded and growing. My how times have changed!

What's is your criteria?

Get out there and meet people

Over the past four weeks I've sent out A TON of emails to various friends, colleagues on LinkedIn or Facebook and even previous co-workers who I worked with or for many years ago. I've notice a fairly decent response rate with replies...but the real learning about opportunities or good career mentoring comes from lunches or coffees...not over email or the phone.

I take a notebook with me to each in-person meeting to jot down any, "you should call X-Person...I hear they are hiring," or "do you know what space is HOT now...it's such 'n such..." notes. As I leaf through my pages at the end of each day I'm surprised by how much new information or new contacts that I've gathered for follow up the next day. The big tip here is to be sure and de-brief yourself after each meeting in the car. Before you start the car, write down further thoughts or information shared during the meeting before it leaves your head...you don't want to get home and think "Ugh...what was the name of that guy who knows that person..." Take the extra five minutes and do the self de-brief...you will not regret it.

I recommend that during these in person sessions that you practice your best social etiquet that your mom taught you. Shake hands firmly, but don't induce carpel tunnel syndrome to your colleague with an iron death grip. Chew your food first...and swallow...don't talk with your mouth full and demonstrate what your hamburger looks like blended. Lastly, and this is most important, don't be a "close talker"....


By internalizing these three important social safety tips you are sure to have a successful meeting that leaves a positive impression with a future employer.

An ancillary benefit of working the "lunch circuit" is the opportunity to get out of the house and see some interesting parts of town. I met my friend Carolyn for lunch at Club Slow in the Mission...a place I would never have found without someone with neighborhood knowledge.

Thanks for reading and please feel free to comment.

Holding out for the right opportunity

I had coffee last week with an executive leader and mentor from a previous e-commerce company that I worked for in San Jose. We met at Peet's in Menlo Park at 8:00am...and WOW, there was a line leading out the door with people getting a cup on the way to work. The economy can't be THAT bad in the Bay Area! However, most of those people in line were knowledge workers...and not a part of the retail worker sector that financial reports on CNBC say make the largest contribution to the unemployment number.

My executive friend is very "human" and willing to share his "from the trenches of the business world" experience with me, a middle manager. I respect his advice a great deal because he's been around a while and has seen economic downturns several times...and knows what NOT to do to foster career growth.

"How badly do you need a job? If you don't have to work, wait for the opportunity that has most of it right. Don't settle for the first job that is offered just to get a job in this tough economy," he replied. He was responding to my question of how flexible I should be with title and compensation...specifically as it relates to my transition from being an individual contributor to a team manager/leader.

In my focus to "stop the financial bleeding" I had expressed to my mentor a possible interest in an individual contributor job at a company that is in a growing industry received Series C funding in late 2007. "Getting ANY job in this economy is a good thing," I mused.

"What you want to avoid is having to explain what happened in your interview for the job AFTER this next job," he began. "You had a nice run...with great career progress. You went from manager to senior manager when I met you. You left our company to become a director. If your next position is back to a senior manager (individual contributor) you will spend time in your next interview explaining what happened to your career. You need to keep progressing...even through tougher times."

Wow, how have economic times changed...even from a year ago. I've discussed my mentor's input with several other unemployed friends who are making the transition to middle management too. There are several individual contributor roles that I've come across...and very few team leader positions. Position title and compensation all depend on the organization, though, so it's hard to create a "rule" for the right position.

Can the unemployed in this downturn afford to hold out for the "right" opportunity? I re-connected with a previous coworker who cannot..he needs a job to make ends meet. Or, is it better to take hold true to career growth....and dig deeper into the network to find the "right" opportunity?

I think the decision will be made based on the level of savings in a person's account...and level of risk tolerance...or faith, that something "more right" will come along.

I'm taking a wait and see attitude. Good things will happen...they always do.

I feel "unemployed" today...and I kind of like it...for now

Wow…today I really felt unemployed this Tuesday after a long weekend.

Today most of my friends braved the commute up and down the peninsula in the rain…and have to motivate to get through emails to uncover the weekly tasks. Hopefully they can take CalTrain and get a strong coffee in the morning! I have to admit I’m not jealous of them making the commute…but I can feel a “strain” in me that wants to get back to work.

However, nothing beats sitting at my computer all day in sweatpants and my vintage UCLA Athletics t-shirt. I have not shaved and my “bed head” is in full flair. I’m debating if showering is really necessary. After all, I showered on Monday…and was in-doors all day to escape the rain. Today will be more of the same…only I will be exercising my fingers as I browse job listings and respond to emails from LinkedIn contacts and friends.

I feel the need to remain disciplined so I plan to keep a regimen of getting started each day by no later than 7:30am. I start each morning by pouring my first cup of coffee from my French press (a perfect gift from my mom this past Christmas) and turning on “Squawk on the Street” on CNBC…to then switch over the Internet radio through iTunes by 9:00am…having the TV on post 9:00am makes me depressed.

I had an interesting phone call with a friend from my days at eBay, Elmer. Elmer now runs a division of Facebook and shared some interesting advice to guide the beginning of my job search. He said before I begin, I must be clear on three things...

1. What am I looking for in the next job…down to the job functional, type of industry/company, work environment, etc.
2. What value can I bring to the next company
3. Be genuine in my contact with people…leverage the network of friends and colleagues that I already have…don’t be the guy who reaches out only when something is needed.

Wow, Elmer….great advice and something we should all keep in mind.

What to do when you get canned from your job...in 7 easy steps!

Going through the process of getting laid off sucks...to say the least. The process is really disruptive to the daily routine, the bank account and the psyche. Now that I've been through it, I've realized a few must-do steps to ease any transition out of company...when you only have a few hours to collect your stuff and get out of there.

Please feel free to add steps that I may have missed. Your input will be appreciated.

Step 1: Verify final payment, severance and 401K distribution

Be sure you have received the following info from HR before you leave the office. These items are typically covered during the "your job has been eliminated" conversation, but the HR team at my company is far less organized and I had to cover these myself...

• When is your last "official" day of work when you are on the payroll? When will you get your final check? Will the check be a hard copy or will it be direct deposited?
• If you get severance pay, and thankfully I did, how much is the severance and when will you be sent payment?
• What is the process to handle 401K roll over? Do you need to reach out to the provider or will the provider reach out to you with process details?
  

Step 2: Save your personal docs and contacts to a thumb drive
Before you turn in your laptop, be sure you save the following to a thumb drive or email the following to your POP account.

• All personal files,pics
• Export into a .csv or .xls file your Outlook Contacts
  

Step 3: Talk to IT about turning off your PDA account without deleting contacts

Ask the IT team how to handle turning off network access to your iPhone or Blackberry..without deleting all of your stored contacts. Doh! I deleted my employers account from the iPhone...and thus deleted all emails, calendar invites and contacts. Luckily I had saved my Outlook Contacts before hand!

Step 4: Pack up your cube

• Pack your memorabilia into the boxes HR provided...even that hula girl you brought back from Hawaii
• Ask the most senior person left in your team what hard copy files he/she would like saved. Go through the remaining files and place all papers in the tall recycle box that we all have in our cubes.
  

Step 5: Say goodbye...quickly

• Saying goodbye just after a lay off sucks...is awkward..and is no fun for anyone. I recommend just saying goodbye to your close office "posse" who probably already know your personal email address.
• Find the person that laid you off and give them a kiss and a pat on the ass.* I so wanted to do this to the person who let me go...I would have been killed instantly, but my name would have lived in infamy.
  

*exercise this option with extreme caution. I would not really do this :-)

Step 6: Get the hell out of the office

• Jump into your car and drive to the nearest bar to compare notes with your fellow victims.

Step 7: Sign up for Unemployment benefits

• Sign up for unemployment benefits as soon as you get home. You qualify to receive the government checks the last day that you are on the company payroll. The application process is all online and takes a few minutes to complete...but it takes a few weeks to start receiving the checks.